staying away and stepping back

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Dublin, Henry Miller, Ireland, new beingings, photography, photos, quote, stepping away

Trying to figure a few things out often means spending time away from what you usually do. By changing your routine you free up time and can tackle all those questions that swirl around in your mind. By stepping away you can step back and take a new look at what the issues are. But no matter how far away you step, eventually, you need to step back into your ‘normality’, whatever that may be.

And while it is sometime hard to step back into your routine, one step at a time seems to be the best way, even if the progress is slow at least it means you are moving forward. And if you set yourself some goals (or write long to do lists) they seem to guide you like the light of a lighthouse in the distance.

One’s destination is never a place, but a new way of seeing things.

Henry Miller

happy belated birthday to me

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belated birthday, birthdays, cake, celebration, friends, gifts, photography, photos, post

This year my birthday fell on a Wednesday – right in the middle of a very busy week. It was an odd day, no letters to open, no gift to unwrap, just a few bings of my phone wishing me a ‘happy birthday’ via text. So as I walked into work I realised that I didn’t feel birhday-y at all – and not even in a bad way, it just all felt very grown-up and matter of fact.

My one treat of the day was free tickets to go to the preview screening of Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them. A little bit of magic and enchantment to excite the child within, ending the day on a much less adult note.

When I arrived home I found the post had been there and had left me a notice to come an pick up what didn’t fit through the letter-box, which is exactly what I did late on Friday afternoon when I had the time.

So yesterday morning I celebrated my birthday a few days late, unwrapped the thoughtful gifts that had arrived in the post. I sat surrounded by love in the form of cards and wrapping paper, each word and surprise making me feel special.

When my neighbour showed up, a song on her lips and a cupcake in her hands, I couldn’t help but notice the giddy feeling rising up inside me and I couldn’t help but think that I’m not so grown-up after all.

So maybe you’re never to old for birthday surprises but sometimes you just have to wait until all the grow-up tasks are done to be able to enjoy it. And even if it was  a few days late I really enjoyed this years birthday and took the time to thoroughly enjoy it.

a treat brought over by neigbours accompanied by a song

some gifts arrived in the post

another brick in the wall

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another brick on the wall, Dublin, graffiti, graffiti Dublin, Pink Floyd, thoughts, wall art

Walking home the other day I saw something out of the corner of my eye and stopped to take a closer look. It was an unassuming line of graffiti stenciled onto the quay wall, just a little way off the ground, maybe at thigh level. It read: Don’t be another brick in the wall. First it made me smile and then it made me think.

I looked around and saw how most of the people walking across the bridge or down the quays were engrossed in their phones, faces tilted downwards, eyes glued to the screens, some were wearing headphones, others just a faraway look.

As I walked away, Pink Floyd the soundtrack in my head,  I couldn’t help but wonder what the graffiti artist meant, was it just a little joke about walls and bricks or was he trying to tell passersby to not build walls around themselves that detach them from reality, or to not become a brick in someone else’s wall but to become an active part in their lives.

However the artist meant it I did feel that the words were somehow hidden in plain sight – like a secret I was let in on just because I stopped and looked and didn’t just walk by, my eyes fixed on my phone. I wondered how many others had spotted it, how many would or would it be just another neglected piece of graffiti that, unnoticed, would wash away in time.

To me it was just a simple reminder that the world around me is so much more interesting and surprising than anything I could find in my phone with the added bonus that it is real, not just a fictional online world that in the end is often too fast-paced to make any long-lasting impact.

walking by and made to think

making us believe

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believing, cognitive fluency, Oscar Wilde, quote, truth, truth and lies

What is the truth? Something you can prove with fact! But what if there is no book knowledge or facts to support what you believe to be true? And how easily are we swayed to trust in something untruthful?

Studies have shown that advertisers, politicians and even journalist use repetition to make people believe them, and interestingly enough it works. The reason behind this is something called cognitive fluency, basically how easy is it for the brain to think about something. When something is familiar we need less effort to process the information, which means we are more likely to believe it to be true.

This obviously makes it harder for us to believe complex thoughts or ideas. If our brain has to go into overdrive to compute elaborate and manifold thoughts we become distrustful, our minds confusing new with wrong. The only way to bypass this default setting in our brains is to repeat the information, even just once helps, but three to five times is optimal.

However we don’t just blindly believe something we hear again and again if we concentrate, when we actively process the information presented we are less likely to fall into the “I’ve heard it before so it must be true”-trap. This means that advertisement benefits from the fact that we are normally too distracted to really compute what we hear, making it easier for us to just except it to be true, instead of using precious mind power to think about it.

Another trick advertisers use to make us believe that what they have to say is true is imagery.  When we hear words and see a picture of the topic at hand at the same time we are more likely to trust the statement. Somehow our brains associate pictures with proof, turning it into a fact and we believe it.

So maybe if we want that pay-rise or an extra day leave we should just keep telling or boss about it, hold up a picture of a pile of money or a beach while we do so and wait for moments in which  he/she is distracted. Maybe then he will believe it and give in to what you know to be true!

After all as the wonderful Oscar Wilde once said:

The pure and simple truth is rarely pure and never simple

indecisive decisions – maybe

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choices, decisions, indecisions, judgements, life changing, logic vs intuition, psychology, unconcious bias

From deciding what to wear and have for breakfast until when to go to bed at night, all day long we are bombarded with decisions that we need to make.  Should I stick with healthy porridge or go for yummy chocolate spread on toast and should I pick my sensible flats or the funky boots that aren’t weather proof. So while I felt crippled with the indecision which tea to drink – should I go fruity or detox or maybe licorice is what I wanted, or maybe mint – I couldn’t help but wonder about the decisions we make and why we make them.

It seems that our intuition and our logic are locked in a constant battle between what we should be doing  and what we want to be doing. So while one part of our brains is trying to analyses and sort through potential consequences the other part is jumping up and down shouting ‘we want it now’.

So while it may seem that we should be giving into logic most of the time we make our decisions based on what our intuition says. The reason for this is the simple fact that our intuitive mind is much faster, easier to accessed and often just overrides our sluggish logical mind.

But even when we think we are being logical and analytical our thinking is actually riddled with unconscious bias. Unconscious biases are all those judgements we are unaware of making when confronted with situations and people. These judgements are generally based on individual backgrounds, educations, cultural environment and experiences but are triggered by the brain without us realizing it.

So where does that leave us – do we just give in to our ‘gut feeling’ or do we hope our unconscious bias isn’t sabotaging us?

Maybe the trick lies in the balance. If the choice of breakfast in the morning won’t change the rest of your life, maybe just stick with what you think is best but if the decision you are about to make may have long lasting effects maybe think about it. And sometimes, maybe, indecision forces you to look at why you want to decided one way and force you to take a closer look at your own unconscious bias.

which to pick – maybe not important but a choice I have to make

to be honest

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breakfast, food, honesty, poppy-seed honesty, smiles, stuck between my teeth, teaching

Breakfast is said to be the most important meal of the day, it gives you energy for the day and kick-starts your metabolism into gear, helping you break down those mean calories. Because of this I always make sure to start my day with a large cup of tea and a bite to eat. Normally it’s a slice of toast, a bowl of muesli or now, with the cold season knocking on the door I mostly opt for porridge.

But yesterday I had a poppy-seed bagel, lightly toasted and with some lovely chocolate spread to sweeten the deal. I thoroughly enjoy it and had a happy smile on my face as I left for work. I hurried to the bus, grinned at the bus-driver and flashed my teeth at the handsome chap on my right.

Then I stood in front of my students and tried to impart wisdom in a lively and interesting fashion, smiling, grinning and talking all the time. But when the students left and I went to wash my hands I caught a glimpse at myself in the mirror. I was horrified, right there for the whole world to see was a big, black poppy-seed stuck in between the gap right next to my two front teeth.

Suddenly my whole morning flashed before my eyes, the many smiles, grins and teeth-flashing making me cringe with embarrassment. But then I got angry with all those people I had met, strangers and students alike, after all WHY had no one told me? Where was the poppy-seed honesty that I thought was an unspoken rule of life?

I started thinking about how we always uphold honesty as a pillar of society and hate it when people lie to us. But funnily enough the only time I ever hear “to be honest” it is always followed with some sort of critic or negative statement. But simple honest interaction seems to be not the done thing, sadly and it leaves us all running around with seeds stuck in our teeth, our skirts tucked into our pants, tomato sauce stains on our shirts and toilet paper stuck to our shoes. Not a pretty sight!

So please the next time you see me with a bugger in my nose, something stuck in my hair or lipstick on my tooth please tell me and I promise I will practice poppy-seed honesty when ever I can too!

 

walking thoughts

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autumn, dreaming, Friedrich Nietzsche, photography, photos, planning, quotes, walking, wondering

All truly great thoughts are conceived by walking

Friedrich Nietzsche

Dublin is a great place to walk around. The inner city is small enough to allow you to wander from a to b quite easily and it is really quite flat. So when I left my afternoon appointment yesterday I decided to let my feet do the walking and my mind wander.

My brogue clad feet tapped on the path as I walked, a steady tattoo of sound my  companion as I walked down the leafy streets of a south side Georgian terrace. For the first time in months I had to shrug a jacket on to stop the wind from chilling my bones and  maybe it was my imagination playing tricks on me but I thought that the air smelt colder, announcing that Autumn had truly arrived.

Unlike so many others I quite enjoy this time of year: the riot of colours in the parks and lining the streets; the comfy cardigans; hot plates of soup and the first lit fires of the season I sit next too while I knit.

As I walked my thoughts changed, plans made way to dreams and I allowed myself to be excited by possibilities, no matter how unsure or far away they seemed. So, while I know the rain and winds that this time of year brings may dampen my mood at times, I am quite looking forward to the next few months, and I hope that for me autumn won’t just be the end of something but also the beginning. And if not – well at least it also means Christmas isn’t too far anymore.

leaves changing colours

just wondering

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bee, determination, photo, quote, thoughts, Wayne Dyer, wondering, writing

This morning I was watching a  bee flit around the flowers on my windowsill and marveled at how she seemed so filled with purpose and determination. Her weight bent the stalks of the blossoms but she held on and crawled inwards as far as she could go. After a while she flew off and left me wondering.

Wondering about why the bee knew with such certainty what she wanted and how she was going to get it when I often struggle with that. Not the knowing what I want, more the ‘how I’m going to get it’. Seeing how the bee allowed the stalk to bend to the point that it would break, but it didn’t made me wonder if maybe I just give up to quickly sometimes.

With that in mind I will keep staring at the blinking cursor on my screen and hope that my attempts at getting this book done will be rewarded, without me breaking or me breaking my laptop first!

There is no scarcity of opportunity to make a living at what you love; there’s only  scarcity of resolve to make it happen.

 Wayne Dyer

 

Weekly Photo Challenge: Jubilant

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Jubilant, music, photo, photogrpahy, singer, St Petersburg, travel, Weekly Photo Challenge, Weekly Photo Challenge: Jubilant

Jubilant – what a wonderful word, and what an even better feeling. One we may not have as often as we like, but then maybe we don’t take enough pleasure in the little things so we don’t recognize it when it peaks around the corner of our emotions. After all it is so much easier to spot those unhappy moments in the making then the joyous ones before they show up .

I can be Jubilant one moment and pensive the next, and a cloud could go by and make that happen

Bob Dylan

hay fever alert

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antihistamnines, calcium, hay fever, health, magnesium, pills, sticky eyes

I woke up with  a little surprise in bed with me this morning, sticky eyes are back and that can only mean one thing: hay-fever season has arrived and settled in over night.

Hay-fever visits me every year, sometimes it is just little a bit annoying, sometimes it needs a bit more attention, and other times it takes over my life. I am not sure what the sneezer has planned for this year but if my sticky eyes and scratchy throat are anything to go by it definitely is an attention seeker.

So while I spent a huge chunk of my morning un-gunking my eyes, yes I had those awfully gooey bits of yellow sleepy-eye gluing my eyelashes together and keeping me in semi-darkness, I was wondering if it was time to start popping pills and save myself from sneeze attacks. The problem is most antihistamines effect me more than just a little on the side.

Some make me so drowsy that I can’t string sentences together and just want to sleep, some effect my skin (I have eczema)  and leave me with itchiness and sometimes red patches of flakiness. Other pills have been known to make me a little high, a little depressed or just don’t work. But I do own some white oval pills that do the job and only make me sluggish, turning work into a bit of a herculean task. Sadly as I have quite a lot to do today I don’t think those little friendly helpers are an option and I will just have to keep tissues by my side and try not to spray my computer.

But while I was contemplating my possibilities I wondered about alternative options, I have tried acupuncture and homeopathy in the past and they didn’t work, although I do know that others have had more success. I have tried upping my calcium and magnesium intake and it does partially work as it makes the sneezes less moist and my eyes a little clearer. So as I munch on a banana and spoon some yogurt I am hoping it will help me be less irritated and keep Mr Hay-fever at bay.