Last night I sat in front of the fire, knitting and watching some TV. I was minding my own business when suddenly a cactus attacked me, it literally jumped me and I bear the scratches to prove it.
Maybe I should explain how I even got myself into the position of being attacked by a cactus as I am not really a cactus fan – I find them quite ugly and I have never really owned one.
Anyway, a good friend of mine bought a house this year and since she is still doing it up and no one, not even a cactus, can live in the house in the moment she has found a bed-in-a-shed at her boyfriend’s house and has asked me to cactus-sit. And I have been – dutifully ignoring it (which is not that easy as it is 180cm tall and very prickly) and watering it from time-to-time. And yes, I have even given it a name – Fred.
So, Fred and I have been living side by side, peacefully enough, and every now and then he will pull my hair or prick me if I come to close. Until yesterday that is – for no reason what so ever, no provocation or to-close-cleaning, Fred decided to topple on top of me. No warning, no ‘timber’, just a silent, slow topple.
Luckily, I was able to ward off the attack with my right arm, and while I am now quite badly scratched – looks like I’ve been in a fight with a very large and angry tom-cat – Fred stayed mostly intact, all he lost was a tiny little ‘branch’ (no idea what they are called in cacti lingo).
Now I am truly looking forward to the day Fred will move out – no hard feelings but I don’t like prickly pranks
jensinewall 
Not sure why anyone would want one in a house….
I know – but what don’t you do for friends you love?
A very long time ago, in another lifetime, I was in an unhappy relationship. I remember on New Year’s Eve standing with a friend at midnight, and he hugged me and whispered “This year, you do something for yourself.” (I did – the next day I left that relationship, but that isn’t the point here). Speaking of the point … there we were, holding each other and crying and thinking about the future … and suddenly I realise that my leg hurts. I’ve been scratched. By a cactus. We were STANDING IN A CACTUS for this poignant, pointy moment. I don’t even know how long we were standing in the cactus for, or how either of us missed it when we first stepped into it. But there you go. That cactus saved my life. I mean, I’m grateful, but I still don’t choose to hang out with cacti anymore.
Wow what a tale … No life changing event happened for me but who knows maybe a handsome doctor will notice my scratches and fall in love!
Sure. Just don’t let them get infected. That isn’t attractive.