maddening men

Tags

60s, cold war, Don Draper, fashion, fashion of the sixties, Mad Men, miscellaneous, pastel colours, pencil skirts, quote, random, space travel, thoughts, Tv, TV series

When Mad Men entered the living rooms of the world I didn’t invite them in and the whole craze somehow passed me by. Of course I have enjoyed some side effects,  fashion of the sixties with a modern twist has been gracing the windows of many a high-street clothes shop, vintage has reached a new high and certain cocktails have become en vogue again but other then that I haven’t really been influenced one way or the other.

But this week, looking for something to take my mind off work and not really having much time to play I have been dipping into online episodes of Mad Men, but I have to say I really don’t understand what the fuss is about. While I enjoy the lovely silhouettes of the female form sashaying across the screen in tight pencil skirts and even tighter sweaters, portraying a time where curves were appreciated and stick thin had not yet taken over the world of fashion, I find most of the men really unlikeable, all seem to drink too much, cheat even more and have no moral compass whatsoever. Maddening men making me just a little bit angry.

Of course I understand that the 60s was an era where men ruled and women cooked, a time when the few choices a female had were typewriters or shopping-carts, but do I really need to watch 45 minutes of men in suits making decisions and women bowing to them. Throw in a long list of -isms, like racism, misogynism, anti-feminism, materialism and communism, a few pastel colours and polyester and the skin-crawling inequality of the 60s is a live and twisting in your home.  And yes, I know that cocktail hour was the main event of the day back then but the amount of smoke and drink that people consume in Mad Men can’t be setting a good example for younger viewers. So ‘no’ it’s not cool to be an alcoholic and addicted to nicotine no matter how cool the studs in suits and ladies in lingerie make it look. And if I really want to know about the periods of pantyhose, cold war and space-travel I can just ask my mum or others who actually worked and played back then and enjoyed not knowing about recycling, peace-keeping and carbon foot-print.

So maybe it’s time to switch off these promiscuous pals and leering lads and not continue to indulge in the frayed fantasy portrayed on the small screen. And while some of the women do seem to succeed against all the odds, true love is always just lurking out of reach and sex is readily available,  I think for now I will paraphrase the dapper Don Draper ‘s

“If you don’t like what’s being said, change the conversation”

 and decide that if I don’t like whats being shown, I’ll change the channel!

surreal smarts

Tags

Albert Camus, art, becoming smarter, books, Camus, David Lynch, favorite book, Franz Kafka, hell is other people, James Joyce, Jean Paul Sartre, Kafka, literature, Metamorphoses, microcosm, No Exit, quotes, random, reading, Salvador Dali, Sartre, surreal, surrealism, The Plague, Ulysses

I love to read and I always have a book on my bedside table, handbag or in my hand. Unlike many avid readers I don’t indulge in more than one book at a time and I always finish any story I have started, the one exception is James Joyce’s “Ulysses“. But anyone who has tried or even succeeded at reading this universal masterpiece will, I believe, concede that it is not that easy to get into let alone understand. However it is on my bucket list and one day I will read it from start to finish, like it or not.

I rarely read a book more than once as I have a good memory and  find I get easily bored when I know how the story ends, and since there are more books in the world than I will ever be able to read I think it is a good investment of my time to read as many new books as possible. I average at a book a week but there was a time when every two or three days I would be in the book store, buying fodder for my passion.

I was 18 or 19 when I discovered Albert Camus, Franz Kafka and Jean Paul Sartre and fell in love. I devoured their books and developed a readers-crush on Sartre literally gorged on everything he had written, even got my boyfriend infected. My favorite book of his was and is “No Exit” , a surreal tale about death and the source of the famous and often overused quote “Hell is other people”. But Camus’s “The Plague” was another firm favourite as was Kafka’s “Metamorphoses”. I loved the way these writers and thinkers didn’t stick to the rules of this world and created new ones that applied to the microcosm and universes they imagined, even if they were a little disturbing.

Now, I know that reading is meant to be good for you, helps you practices your imagination, increases your vocabulary and communication skills but I was surprised to recently read that surreal stories could help you become smarter. I stumbled upon an old article from 2009 saying that because our mind wants to understand how things work, tries to find the logic and structure in our environment that reading surreal tales challenges our brains. By forcing the cognitive mechanisms in our brains to search for patterns and try to understand what does not make sense we tap into our creative potential and enhance our learning ability.  But not only reading these surreal tales does this, watching David Lynch films or looking at Salvador Dali’s art can have the same effect.

I am not sure if dipping into the world of surrealism has really made me smarter but I do think that by reading about unexplainable worlds, I look out for the unusual, quirky and a little weird. Finding happiness in those moments that are not the norm and loving those truly wacky experiences.

I believe that Kafka said it best:

Many a book is like a key to unknown chambers within the castle of one’s own self.

 

Kafka makes you smarter

pill popping problem

Tags

bananas, calcium intake, gunk, hay fever, hay fever season, health, pills, popping pills, sticky eyes

I woke up with  a little surprise in bed with me this morning, sticky eyes are back and that can only mean one thing: hay-fever season has arrived and settled in over night.

Hay-fever visits me every year, sometimes it is just little a bit annoying, sometimes it needs a bit more attention, and other times it takes over my life. I am not sure what the sneezer has planned for this year but if my sticky eyes and scratchy throat are anything to go by it definitely is an attention seeker.

So while I spent a huge chunk of my morning un-gunking my eyes, yes I had those awfully gooey bits of yellow sleepy-eye gluing my eyelashes together and keeping me in semi-darkness, I was wondering if it was time to start popping pills and save myself from sneeze attacks. The problem is most antihistamines effect me more than just a little on the side.

Some make me so drowsy that I can’t string sentences together and just want to sleep, some effect my skin (I have eczema)  and leave me with itchiness and sometimes red patches of flakiness. Other pills have been known to make me a little high, a little depressed or just don’t work. But I do own some white oval pills that do the job and only make me sluggish, turning work into a bit of a herculean task. Sadly as I have quite a lot to do today I don’t think those little friendly helpers are an option and I will just have to keep tissues by my side and try not to spray my computer.

But while I was contemplating my possibilities I wondered about alternative options, I have tried acupuncture and homeopathy in the past and they didn’t work, although I do know that others have had more success. I have tried upping my calcium intake and it does partially work as it makes the sneezes less moist and my eyes a little clearer. So as I munch on a banana and spoon some yogurt I am hoping it will help me be less irritated and keep Mr Hay-fever at bay.

light and dark in the park

Tags

barking dogs, beach, contentment, crying children, Dublin, light and dark, miscellaneous, nature, outdoors, park, photograpy, photos, random, St Anne's Park, sun, sunday, thoughts

Yesterday was a close to perfect day. After a leisurely morning at home and some chocolate spread on toast I decided to enjoy the sun and spent the day in the park. At first I was going to go to the beach and enjoy the sea, sand and air but because it was literally a  Sun-day I decided against it. You see when it’s hot, sunny and the weekend the beach fills up with loud teenagers, crying children, barking dogs, barbequing families and lobster people, those weirdos who lie out in the sun till they go bright red and then just flop over to burn the other side. I normally don’t mind but yesterday I wanted a bit more peace and quite.

I packed a small bag with a picnic for one, my camera and lenses, a book and applied a lot of suncream, not wanting to join the multitudes of lobsters walking around Dublin today. I jumped on the bus and enjoyed the short trip down the coast to my favourite park, St Anne’s. I have been going there ever since I was a little girl and love the variety and space it has to offer. As the light was beautiful and I had all the time in the world I was looking forward to taking some photos, a hobby of mine even if most of the time I have no idea what I am doing. Sadly after just a  few clicks my battery told me I needed to charge it, yes I had made the vital error of not checking before I left the house.

A little annoyed with myself I decided to continue my stroll underneath the arches of the trees and enjoy the play of light and shadow. I loved how the leaves varied in their shades of green and how they were back-lit from the sun, casting shadows and shapes on the ground, trucks and branches around me.  Later I sat leaning against a tree and watched as a dad blew bubbles for his toddling child, couples kissed in the grass and a family played tag running laughing across the field. As I observed from a distance I felt a little sad to be on my own, not having someone to share the moment with. But I suddenly realised that without sadness you can’t feel happiness, just like light can’t exist without the dark.

After a few hours of reading, dreaming and ambling barefoot in a field laced with daisies and buttercups I treated myself to cup of cappuccino and strolled around the rose-garden. With the smell of BBQ in the air and birds song welcoming the evening I started to walk home along the coast as the sun began to sink slowly in the sky. And as the sun lit up the sea I felt content to be on my own, a feeling like dusk, where light meets dark and creates its own unique light, contentment is a feeling that can be both sad and happy but simply enjoys the fleeting moment you are in.

The last photo I took before my camera died … shadows on bark

sunshine and pants

Tags

awards, blogs, friends, love, loyal friend, miscellaneous, pants, random, sunshine, thoughts, writing

Well I am thrilled this week two lovely awards have been bestowed upon me and I really don’t know what to say … I suppose a big thank you is all I can do for now, just except, smile and take a bow.

The Sisterhood of the World Bloogers Award was sent to me by the very young but insightful Naima. Not only was I thrilled and very surprised but I love the look of the award too.

The are a few rules so here they go:

• Include the award’s logo in a post or on your blog.
• Share the love and link the person who nominated you.
• Tell 7 facts about yourself.
• Nominate 7 other fabulous bloggers.
• Link your nominees to this post and comment on their blogs, letting them know they have been nominated.

The seven facts about myself (really who wants to know?) are:

1) I am a paper and pencil kind of girl, although I do type away on my Mac all day I have a passion for all things paper.

2) I am a good cook and bake … just don’t really get the opportunity too often as am single and live on my own.

3) I am a very loyal friend and love them dearly.

4) I love walks on the beach and taking photos

5) I have tried to go to Italy four  times, it somehow never worked out but I hope I get to go this year.

5) I am a green label Lyons Tea girl

6) I always have a book I am reading, mostly carry it with me and it’s a new one every week

7) I can’t type with all 10 fingers (well properly) but I have my own six-fingered system and I am very fast.

And here are all of my nominees, check them out, enjoy getting to know them and have fun:

The lovely Miles

Entertaining morezenow

Funny lilandjill

Readable Kate

The fabulous  Sorryiamnotsorry

Pink Suzy

Interesting 400days

Adorable RealityinProgress

And because she hates having to re-post I want to give a special nomination to Gorgeous jotsfromasmallapt … check her out and love her as much as I do .. and Jots if you don’t want to don’t repost 🙂

The cheery and so weather appropriate Sunshine Award popped up in my comments early on this week and the lovely GoodOldGirl is to thank for that.  So while I get the sunblock why not have a peek at her lovely insightful and often very funny posts.

The are a few rules so here they go:

• Include the award’s logo in a post or on your blog.
• Answer 10 questions about yourself.
• Nominate other fabulous bloggers.
• Link your nominees to this post and comment on their blogs, letting them know they have been nominated.
• Share the love and link the person who nominated you.

1. What is a favorite childhood memory? Oh I have so many but I think the most excited I ever was when me and my sister flew for the first time on our own … I was five she was seven and the airline went on strike so instead of a direct flight from Dublin to Hamburg we went on a European  tour and got loads of gifts and attention.
2. What is a real fear you have? I think dieing old and alone, even worse in a body that doesn’t function but with an alert mind
3. How would you describe yourself? Creative, clever and a little off center 
4. What Countries have you lived in? South Africa, Ireland and Germany and then Ireland again
5. What is your style? I don’t have a style, maybe a bit arty and hippie … lose fitting and natural fabrics. love shoes but love going barefoot
6. What is your favorite breakfast food? I nee my tea, have toast or muesli most days, porridge in the winter but every now and then I love a big fry-up and fruit after
7. What are some of your hobbies? Films, reading, writing I use to paint and need to take it up again, love my friends and what ever pops into my mind
8. If you could tell people anything, what would be the most important thing to say? Always stay true to yourself and love.
9. What is one of your passions? SHOES
10. What is the one truth you have learned? It’s hard to find the right guy but so much better being on your own the with the wrong one

And here are all of my nominees, check them out, enjoy getting to know them and have fun:

thesubterraneanworld

newsofthetimes

thewitcontinuum

ailialana

vickynewham

katespadegirl

life@thirtysomething

spookysister

circlesunderstreetlights

ellieboo

demanding TV

Tags

candy store, choice, digital candy, digital-candy store, emotions, Films, Grenville Kleister, on-demand tv, pasta sauce, psychology, quotes, regrets, relationships, Tv, wrong place right time

Yesterday evening when I sat down with a glass of wine to see if the world of telly had anything exciting on offer I was in for a big surprise: I now have on-demand TV. Odd really as I was at the launch on Tuesday (see my post wrong place right time) but somehow I had completely forgotten about it.

Anyway when I pressed a button on the remote my flat-screen told me I had a choice, I could watch normal “live” TV or the pick of the day or I could choose from a selection of series and films. At first I couldn’t believe my luck, I felt like a kid in a  digital candy store, but soon I was somewhat overwhelmed, there where so many buttons to press and decisions to make and in some cases even euros to pay. On the one hand it was nice to be able to pick and choose, on the other it was hard to know what I wanted.

I suppose it’s a little like life, we want as many choices as possible but then can’t make up our minds. It doesn’t matter if it’s what career we what to pursue, what dream to follow, who we want to date, what dress, shoes or pants to buy or even as simple as what kind of sauce we want to have with our pasta. I suppose the problem with making a choice, saying ‘yes’ to one thing, is that it always means we have to say ‘no’ to something else. If it’s just the pasta sauce that may not be such a big problem as we can just go back and pick another flavour the next time, with a career or dream or partner it may not be as simple.

And sometimes when we say ‘no’ to one thing we feel regret if the choice we made doesn’t turn out the way we hoped. Regret is one of those feelings that in psychology is termed a ‘moral emotion’, like guilt it is a feeling we get that we turn towards ourselves and not at others. But unlike guilt regret is something that is very hard to make up. When you feel guilty you can often ask for forgiveness and move on, but going back in time to change a choice is something we just can’t do. The upside to having moral emotions is the fact that it means you’re are not a psychopath as they are incapable of any moral feelings, so yeah to that.

But like guilt regret only makes us feel bad about ourselves and keeping those feelings alive doesn’t help us as they are not productive in any way. The best we can do is learn from our decision and move on, leave it behind us and understand that regret is only born out of knowledge we often didn’t have at the time when making the choice. If we had known our job would make us unhappy, our relationship would fail or the pasta sauce tasted awful we wouldn’t have made the choice in the first place.

So when I finally decided on what I wanted to see, I was thrilled with the fact that a video rental store had moved into my living-room and I was happy to pay a few euros to see I film I had missed in the cinema. And even though I know that I will make choices I may regret in the future I completely agree with American author Grenville Kleiser:

A ton of regret never makes an ounce of difference.

hairy legs, hospitals and open doors

Tags

Dublin, family, friends, hairy legs, home, hospital, open doors, random, shower, thoughts

A lovely friend of mine called me yesterday morning, close to tears and needing a favour. She was having some routine check-up done in a big south side Dublin hospital and when she arrived at her appointment they wouldn’t do it if she didn’t have anyone to pick her up, safety policy and all that jazz.

As a single female living in a different country than her family she is in a similar position to myself, who is your go-to person when needed? Friends work, have families of their own and have other things to do. So in her moment of need she asked me to come and save her, as a good friemily I made the time and arranged to be available.

So when I got the call from the hospital to come and get her I jumped in the Luas and sped towards the hospital. It was s beautiful sunny day, hot and real summery so I was just wearing a light top and some cropped jeans. As I I took my seat  and stretched out my legs, feeling happy and relaxed, I noticed with horror that my legs were more bristly than I thought and against my pale pasty skin the dark hairs were quite visible. Not being able to concentrate on my book I tried to curl my legs out of sight and hoped no one would notice. My carefree-spirit was suddenly overly conscious of my extremities with their tufts spouting. But as I couldn’t change the situation I just spent the day walking really fast, hiding my legs and planning a shower asap.

This morning, razor in hand, I was having a shower singing “true colours” and water dancing when a voice coming from my living room stopped me in my tracks. I live alone and although I was expecting a friend to drop off something I knew she didn’t have a key, so when I heard her calling my name I was more than just a little surprised. As I threw on my trusty robe and hurried down the stairs, dripping drops of water as I descended, I welcomed my friend with a questioning look and inquiring how she had gotten in.

I live close to the city center and friends will attest that it is not necessarily the best or safest location as right beside it are council flats and hooligan headquarters. But the little cul-de-sac my home is part of is a bit different, quite quaint and almost provincial and very community oriented, but I still lock my door.

I am not sure if my hairy legs distracted me or my rushing around yesterday was at fault but for some bizarre reason I didn’t close my front door properly when I came  home yesterday. So when my friend arrived she thought I had left my door open just for her, we were both quite shocked to find that it had been open a tiny bit all night. With my handbag sitting on the table, my Mac clearly on display and a little notebook perched on the daybed it would have been a burglars paradise. But I have to say that it makes me feel even better about the place I live in, to know that I was safe even when I made myself vulnerable, but I will be double checking tonight.

With a lesson learn I have discovered that when you open up doors you never know what surprise lies behind them, and sometimes it can be a friend standing in your living room.

 

smelly summer in the city

Tags

Dublin, fake tan, fashion, Liffey, miscellaneous, nose, odours, pee, random, smells, summer, sun, suncream, thoughts, urine

The sun is shining and the temperatures are rising, summer has finally arrived in Dublin. No one knows how long it will stay, so everyone is trying to make the most of it. Winter-coats have made way to t-shirts and skimpy dresses, midriffs are no longer blue from the cold winds but a pale white or a bright fake tan orange, as are the goose-pimpled legs and sunglasses never leave peoples noses.

But when the sun comes out to play here in Dublin she does tend to have a little friend tag along in her wake … odour. The canals start to whiff, the lovely river Liffey sparkles and gives off a slightly funky fishy smell. People on the Luas stand with raised arms and malodorous aromas wafts around your nose and the bins on the street do their own bit of stinking in the sun.

But the two things that really aggravate my nose are those weird, unexplained plastic bags filled with who knows what that suddenly appear beside benches, under bridges and sometimes on the middle of the street exuding rancid smells and the smell of old urine coming from some small alleys and corners beside bars. The plastic bags I cannot explain but how the urine stains appear on walls and paths is quite clear. I really just don’t understand why men think it is okay to pee on the street, just because they can doesn’t mean they should.

But even if my nose is at times offended by the bouquet of summer smells I do love the fact that I can swap shoes for sandals, display my chalky legs in the hope they’ll turn beige and not have to worry about umbrellas poking in my eyes. So as I lather up with suncream and undress as much as I dare I look forward to braving the smells of summer in the city and hope I don’t burn.

 

 

wrong place right time

Tags

bubbly, champagne, egg, food, goodies, miscellaneous, perfect time, random, sperm, thoughts, time, you

There is a small bottle of champagne in my fridge waiting for the right moment to be popped. I am not sure when that will be but maybe I will just celebrate that the sun has finally decided to shine again, or maybe I will keep it for a rainy day.

The little bottle of sparkly found its way into my possession in a paper-bag filled with goodies that I got yesterday because I was in the wrong place at the right time. I was meant to be seeing a film to review, but I got the cinema wrong and ended up at a red-carpet launch for on-demand TV. Never one to say ‘no’ to some free bubbly I was happy to take the unexpected gift home with me and I was especially intrigued by the pair of fluffy socks that were in the bag too.

This bag of surprises made me think about timing and how much it influences our lives. Something as small as being late for a bus can change the whole day, you feel stressed and annoyed which influences how you then approach others.  Or if you just happen to bump into someone you know and like but haven’t seen for a while it makes you smile and the day suddenly seems brighter. A postcard that arrives on a day you are feeling low makes you feel better, you open the oven at the right time and the souffle is perfect or you are standing in the wrong place and bird droppings land on your head. Even the fact that you are you is all down to timing, after all that one sperm had to find the egg in the perfect moment to create the uniqueness that is you.

So with so little time on my hands I think that being at the right place is of great importance today, but then who knows if I do end up somewhere at the wrong time, or at the right time in the wrong place what kind of goodies await me.

 

 

waking up is hard to do

Tags

alarm, alarm clock, dreams, energy, health, hopes and dreams, ideas, Lady and the Tramp, love, power resources, random, reality, rooster, size siz, sleep, thoughts, unrealistic idea, waking-up

This morning when my alarm-clock tore me out of my dreams with its rooster cry, waking up was hard to do. My bed was so warm and cosy that I found it very hard to get up, so I pressed snooze a few times. As I was lying in bed, hovering somewhere between dreams and reality, I couldn’t help but wonder: why is it that I find it hard to get to sleep at night but when the new day calls I try to ignore it with every fiber of my being?

At some point between the second and third snooze it occurred to me that life can be like that too. Letting go of ideas, hopes and dreams can be hard, we hang on to them and fight anyone or anything that tries to persuade us to open our eyes and see reality. And no matter how loud the rooster cry we just keep following them, ignoring what could even be in our best interest.

Maybe giving-up on dreams and goals isn’t really the issue, maybe it’s that we have become so use to following them, that we can’t imagine it any other way. A bit like that crush we have on a someone we will never date, we know we will never have a  Lady and the Tramp moment with them, yet not pining seems so empty. So we keep our un-reciprocated love alive and nurture it, instead of going on a date with a real possibility.

Around the fourth barnyard call I realised that by not getting up I was actually wasting quite a lot of energy by just staying put and trying to keep on dreaming. Instead of using my depleted power-resources to get moving and start the day, make some tea to help with my alertness, I was lingering in a state of tiredness, yet not really sleeping to overcome it. So like that unrealistic idea of wearing a size six dress or becoming a superstar I was frittering away time and exerting myself for something that wasn’t doing me any good and felt quite frustrating.

When I finally gave in to Mr Cock-a-doodle-do, I let go of the idea of sleep and let my dreams evaporate into nothingness, focusing on a new day and what it may bring. Luckily with sleep we know a new night will come with Mr Sandman and his sack full of dreams in its wake, in life it’s not quite so easy.  When we give up on a dream we need to feel good about it, we need to be happy with the decision, and sometimes new dreams and ideas aren’t in the wings ready and waiting. So while it isn’t a good idea to keep following something that will never happen, letting go should only be done with a happy heart leaving us free and energized for something new.

For now I will hold on to my cup of tea and sort through my bag of dreams later, I need all my energy to just make some toast, get through the day and dream of a good nights sleep.